Some of you may have experienced being too tired or stressed to eat because of the flu or even depression. But for most of us, thankfully, we get over it. 3 months into college I almost didn't.
When I was diagnosed with anorexia, I was in denial. Once I finally recognized it, I still didn't realize that it was serious. While I've admitted my past to some friends and gotten the medical attention I needed, I've never written down the story. Til now.
My depression began with avoiding surgery. I spent the first 3 months of my freshman year at BYU-Idaho as an almost mute: No humming, no singing, and very little talking. All while still taking classes as a music major!
Because college is a time to learn time management skills, study hard, and figure out who you are, I was doing all of that. The problem was, I was doing all of that with my key identifying characteristics stripped away. It was exhausting physically and emotionally.
College did not begin at all like I expected. In fact, the longer I live the more the lessons I've had in finding beauty in the unexpected.
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| I eventually found my voice and successfully sang my way through graduation. |
College did not begin at all like I expected. In fact, the longer I live the more the lessons I've had in finding beauty in the unexpected.
There are some things that I hold onto in life so tightly, as though I could guarantee certain outcomes. Even if I have other reasons, I usually do whatever it takes to get what I want from life. I see it a lot in my diet, in the way I parenting, and even when I sing. Is that so bad?
Sometimes I get so anxious about arriving at my final destination that I forget the importance of travelling well. How we get somewhere often affects where we end up.
I think it is important to be aware of who and where you are before you can focus on where you want to go.
As a daughter of God I never thought that I would develop an eating disorder. Because I viewed my body as a gift from Him and my parents, I generally treated it that way. Until I didn't.
I took it for granted that I was healthy but stopped going through the motions that were keeping me healthy. The worst part wasn't the loss of self-love; it was that was too numb to notice.
Join me over at kitchenstewardship.com as I open up about this trial and share the precious lessons I've learned due to increased self awareness. I think all of us could discover and solve problems within ourselves with a healthy dose of self awareness.
Sometimes I get so anxious about arriving at my final destination that I forget the importance of travelling well. How we get somewhere often affects where we end up.
I think it is important to be aware of who and where you are before you can focus on where you want to go.
As a daughter of God I never thought that I would develop an eating disorder. Because I viewed my body as a gift from Him and my parents, I generally treated it that way. Until I didn't.
I took it for granted that I was healthy but stopped going through the motions that were keeping me healthy. The worst part wasn't the loss of self-love; it was that was too numb to notice.
Join me over at kitchenstewardship.com as I open up about this trial and share the precious lessons I've learned due to increased self awareness. I think all of us could discover and solve problems within ourselves with a healthy dose of self awareness.
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